Five Percent, Maybe Six Percent
To the tune of "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" from that great musical, The Sound of Music. Scene: a businessman sitting in the pew as the offering plate is being passed along.
| New Lyrics | Original Lyrics |
| DEVIL ON SHOULDER: You wait, businessman, on the offering plate For it to pass just right on. Your tithe, businessman, is not ten percent 'Cause legalism's dead now. |
ROLF: You wait little girl on an empty stage For fate to turn the light on Your life little girl is an empty page That men will want to write on. |
| ANGEL ON SHOULDER: Is dead - how? |
LIESL: To write on. |
| DEVIL: You give five percent, maybe six percent Hey guy, that's way too much Better be smart, just look at this chart! Hey guy, diversify! |
ROLF: You are sixteen going on seventeen Baby, it's time to think Better beware be canny and careful Baby, you're on the brink |
| You give four percent, maybe five percent ... Re-tire-ment's coming soon. All of those drugs, vacations in Maui, Ex-penses just balloon. |
You are sixteen going on seventeen Fellows will fall in line Eager young lads and roues and cads Will offer you food and wine |
| Totally unprepared are you To face what you can't see. Fearful, in dread, and scared are you Of money that's absentee! |
Totally unprepared are you To face a world of men Timid and shy and scared are you Of things beyond your ken |
| You need someone wily and crafty Telling you it's okay To be greedy, and hard-hearted. Conscience, away with you! |
You need someone older and wiser Telling you what to do I am seventeen going on eighteen I'll take care of you. |
| ANGEL: You give money but not willingly; Tithing you've misconceived. It's what's in your heart, the people you help, The suffering you've relieved. |
LIESL: I am sixteen going on seventeen I know that I'm naïve Fellows I meet may tell me I'm sweet And willingly I believe |
| Yes, give money, but with your heart And give yourself as well. Comfort the widows, father the orphans, And sorrow help dispel. |
I am sixteen going on seventeen Innocent as a rose Bachelor dandies, drinkers of brandies What do I know of those? |
| Totally unprepared are you To face what you can't see. Get on your knees, repent, my friend And cleansed, that's what you'll be. |
Totally unprepared am I To face a world of men Timid and shy and scared am I Of things beyond my ken |
| You need someone wiser to help you Telling you what to do Holy Spirit, come anoint him So he'll depend on you. |
I need someone older and wiser Telling me what to do You are seventeen going on eighteen I'll depend on you. |
Reprint The New Song Lyrics
© 2007, Jean Dickson
Jean V. Dickson offers you these articles to reprint or repost - FREE - provided that her name and contact information (as below) are included.
Jean V. Dickson is a Canadian-based entrepreneur who puts creativity's ZING into training, corporate communications and church worship. Visit her Christian ministry websites, www.fatsheep.org and www.worshipzing.com. To jazz up your corporate PowerPoint presentations, visit The PowerPoint Joint at www.PowerPointjoint.com.
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